After Thoughts
The Poetry of J. Hodges

What if…

What if I lose my job
What if the market crashes
What if she leaves;
leaves me to lie, in ashes

What if I get sick
What if I get high
What if I burn-out
or even worse, somehow, I die

What if I get accused
What if I’m forgotten
What if I lose a friend
or I’m merely treated rotten

What if my world is shakin’
What if I don’t get taken
What if I wreck my vehicle
or just swerve on down the road

What if I come in third
What if I come in last
What if my eyes are blurry
or, all a sudden, I lose my fury

What if I lose my wood
What if I get too lonely
What if I reach for you
then, you act like you don’t know me

What if it all runs out
What if I’m stuck
What if I try real hard
but in the end, don’t give a fuck

What if my hair falls out
What if there is no doubt
What if I’ve lived in vain
and there’s no room left for the pain

What if I just stop
What if I just drop
What if I just relax
and give up

What if, somehow, I know
What if I give up this worry
What if I’ve reached a point
a place without a jury

What if “now” is it
What if I’ve been carried, all along
What if God allowed these things to happen
and right here’s where I belong

What if this is my time
What if He brought me here
What if I stop the worry
and with Him, lose all the fear

What if I can finally see
the things that he has shown me
What if my eyes have opened
and see the truth, right here, before me

Has He brought me to this place
of surrender and of glory
Prepared a place for me,
so, I can tell this story

Of how, he let me wander
of how the blind can see
and He was there to guide me
to this place, that’s not of me.